Hellmark Press

Look upon Despair, ye ignoble, and Work!

20110617

the line is busy.
thus the superior man
waits, speaks, and abides.

please wait for the tone;
in seventeen syllables
tell me your message.

spamsize

little man, little man don't you wanna be SPAM-size? you're a sham little man don't you wanna be SPAM-size? oxycontin, paris hil...
spider hole (buca di ragno) bouilliabaise

A-One an’ a-Two an’ a - 'Cause you'll be down in the gutter You'll be bummin' for cigarettes Bummin' for nylons In t...
suspicious activity signs

Operation TIPS c/o Homeland Security Dear Norm, I drive under your Report Suspicious Activities signs frequently, and read them each time...
churchsign
ah vaudeville!

they used to tell me we were building a dream, that's what dictated my way when there was tar to spread, figuratively, on the informat...
gott im himmel

Dear Norm, My teacher Hates America . Please help! —Student Patriot
numinous earworm bibliomancy!

a colleague and i recently lapsed into another lengthy episode of the earworm game in the office at the instigation of other coworkers' ...
on background

so: there's this chair, an unexceptional, inexpensive, somewhat old, simple rolling desk chair, in my bedroom, which had rested, out of ...